Marge: Homer, when are you going to give up this crazy sugar scheme?
Homer: Never, Marge! Never. I can't live the button-down life like you. I want it all: the terrifying lows, the dizzying highs, the creamy middles. Sure, I might offend a few of the bluenoses with my cocky stride and musky odors -- oh, I'll never be the darling of the so-called "City Fathers" who cluck their tongues, stroke their beards, and talk about "What's to be done with this Homer Simpson?"
Eddie: Do you hold a grudge against Montgomery Burns? Moe: No! *BZZT* Moe: Alright, maybe I did, but I didn't shoot him. *DING* Eddie: Checks out. Okay, sir, you're free to go. Moe: Good, 'cause I got a hot date tonight. *BZZT* Moe: A date. *BZZT* Moe: Dinner with a friend. *BZZT* Moe: Dinner alone. *BZZT* Moe: Watching TV alone. *BZZT* Moe: Alright! I'm going to sit at home and ogle the ladies in the Victoria's Secret catalog. *BZZT* Moe:Sears catalog. *DING* Moe:Now would you unhook this already, please! I don't deserve this kind of shabby treatment! *BZZT*
James Woods: Is it true you once worked for 96 hours straight? Apu: Oh, yes. It was horrible. Near the end, I thought I was a hummingbird of some kind. James Woods: Oh yeah, you know, I studied your old security tapes. Apu (on security tape: Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Apu: In a few minutes, I try to drink nectar out of Sanjay's head
Hank Scorpio: Uh, hi, Homer. What can I do for you? Homer: Sir, I need to know where I can get some business hammocks. Hank Scorpio: Hammocks? My goodness, what an idea. Why didn't I think of that? Hammocks! Homer, there's four places. There's the Hammock Hut, that's on third. Homer: Uh-huh. Hank Scorpio: There's Hammocks-R-Us, that's on third too. You got Put-Your-Butt-There. Homer: Mm-Hmm. Hank Scorpio: That's on third. Swing Low, Sweet Chariot... Matter of fact, they're all in the same complex; it's the hammock complex on third. Homer: Oh, the hammock district! Hank Scorpio: That's right.
Hank Scorpio: Back to the hammocks, my friend. You know, there's a little place called Mary Ann's Hammocks. The nice thing about that place is Mary Ann gets in the hammock with you.
Hank Scorpio: I'm just kidding. Homer: Oh. Hank Scorpio: You know who invented the hammock, Homer? Homer: No. Hank Scorpio: There's something for you to do: find that out.
She's built like a steakhouse, but she handles like a bistro
D'oh: an exclamation of annoyance when something goes wrong
Yoink: An exclamation that, when uttered in conjunction with taking an object, immediately transfers ownership from the original owner to the person using the word regardless of previous property rights
Diddly: a filled pause, a non-word which a speaker uses to take up time or space in a sentence, and which are sometimes used for emphasis
Glayvin: a nonsensical word used to describe any emotion from surprise to joy to sadness
Meh: Indifference; to be used when one simply does not care.
Kwyjibo: A big, dumb, balding North American ape with no chin and a short temper.
Car Hole: a covered place to park your car; synonym for garage
Frogurt: a portmanteau for “frozen yogurt”
Craptacular: of exceptionally poor quality; spectacularly crappy
Unpossible: not possible; synonym of impossible
Embiggen: To make bigger or grow in size; a perfectly cromulent word